Tag: ato writes

Sixish Sentence Sunday

ato-the-bean:

Okay, I found a bit of the new Cleaving chapter that probably doesn’t give it all away. 

“There’s something I want to ask you… ask of you.  And I don’t know how.  It’s not fair.  I just can’t really think of an alternative.”

“Fair… I’m not sure what fair has to do with things.  Was it fair when Nathan and I invaded your home?  Was it fair when you hopped a plane to be with me at the meetings where I learned about him.  If you need something, you ask.”

Chris nodded, taking a deep breath.  “It just seems like neither of us has been happy the last few months, and we should make some changes.  And it’s totally my fault, and I know that.  I’ve accepted too many projects and I’m gone too much.  But my hands are tied; I’ve signed the contracts.  I can fix it as we go forward — I’ve already told Karen I don’t want any new scripts for a while.”  Zach had overheard something like that when Chris was talking to Melissa, but he he hadn’t been sure if Chris was just tired or if this was because of him. Guilt twisted in his stomach.   “But for the next year or so, I have limited options.  I have press for Hours, and filming for Trek and Wonder Woman and Hell or Highwater, and then press for all of that as well.  And after this I can try to limit myself to two projects a year, and try to make sure that one is reasonably local, but until then, I’m going to be on location a lot.”

Zach squeezed his hand.  Shit, that sounded like a lot.  Even without the pressures of planning a wedding or co-parenting, it was a hell of a lot to shoulder in one year.  But Hollywood was unforgiving, and when you were hot, like Chris was at the moment, it was really impossible to say no.  “Chris, I’m not asking you to cut back.  I know this is an important time in your career.”

“I know.  And it is.  And there’s still that voice in the back of my mind that says someday the acting police are going to take my card away, and I’d better work as hard as I can while they let me.  But it’s an important time in our lives, too, Zach.  And in Nathan’s.  I hate that I have to ask you what his favorite game is.  I should just know that.  I’m his dad, too.  And it’s also an important time in your career.  It’s one thing to take some time with limited producing projects so you can be with Nathan, but it’s a different thing when I’m the one asking.  I need to help you carve out time. I know you love producing, but you’re an actor.  A really good actor.   You need room to continue to grow in your craft.  I’m your partner;  should be helping you make time for that rather than sucking all the time for my own career.  I just… I let it get away from me.  And I don’t want to be like that.  My dad was always able to find a life balance.  He always fed his career and the other things that were frankly way more important: his marriage and his kids.  I’m not doing a good job of following his example.”

Sixish Sentence Sunday

Okay, I found a bit of the new Cleaving chapter that probably doesn’t give it all away. 

“There’s something I want to ask you… ask of you.  And I don’t know how.  It’s not fair.  I just can’t really think of an alternative.”

“Fair… I’m not sure what fair has to do with things.  Was it fair when Nathan and I invaded your home?  Was it fair when you hopped a plane to be with me at the meetings where I learned about him.  If you need something, you ask.”

Chris nodded, taking a deep breath.  “It just seems like neither of us has been happy the last few months, and we should make some changes.  And it’s totally my fault, and I know that.  I’ve accepted too many projects and I’m gone too much.  But my hands are tied; I’ve signed the contracts.  I can fix it as we go forward — I’ve already told Karen I don’t want any new scripts for a while.”  Zach had overheard something like that when Chris was talking to Melissa, but he he hadn’t been sure if Chris was just tired or if this was because of him. Guilt twisted in his stomach.   “But for the next year or so, I have limited options.  I have press for Hours, and filming for Trek and Wonder Woman and Hell or Highwater, and then press for all of that as well.  And after this I can try to limit myself to two projects a year, and try to make sure that one is reasonably local, but until then, I’m going to be on location a lot.”

Zach squeezed his hand.  Shit, that sounded like a lot.  Even without the pressures of planning a wedding or co-parenting, it was a hell of a lot to shoulder in one year.  But Hollywood was unforgiving, and when you were hot, like Chris was at the moment, it was really impossible to say no.  “Chris, I’m not asking you to cut back.  I know this is an important time in your career.”

“I know.  And it is.  And there’s still that voice in the back of my mind that says someday the acting police are going to take my card away, and I’d better work as hard as I can while they let me.  But it’s an important time in our lives, too, Zach.  And in Nathan’s.  I hate that I have to ask you what his favorite game is.  I should just know that.  I’m his dad, too.  And it’s also an important time in your career.  It’s one thing to take some time with limited producing projects so you can be with Nathan, but it’s a different thing when I’m the one asking.  I need to help you carve out time. I know you love producing, but you’re an actor.  A really good actor.   You need room to continue to grow in your craft.  I’m your partner;  should be helping you make time for that rather than sucking all the time for my own career.  I just… I let it get away from me.  And I don’t want to be like that.  My dad was always able to find a life balance.  He always fed his career and the other things that were frankly way more important: his marriage and his kids.  I’m not doing a good job of following his example.”

Six(ish) Sentence Sunday

Almost done with the draft of this chapter.  Here’s another snippet.  From Cleaving.

“Hey, Little Man,” he cooed, taking Nathan from his mom.  “What happened?”

Nathan just clung to him as Margo explained, “He had an accident, and I forgot to take the diaper bag with me.  He was almost asleep.  I’m sorry we’re back so soon, I meant to give you boys more time.”

“It’s fine,” he said, carrying his son up the stairs.  “Let’s get you cleaned up, okay, Nathan?  Did you see some nice lights?  Anything fancy?”

Nathan nodded as Zach laid him down on a pad on the bed.  “Snoopy.”

“Snoopy!  That sounds cool.  Did he have a little Christmas tree like in the movie?”

Nathan nodded again as Zach made quick work of the dirty diaper.  His mom handed him a clean pair of pants and Zach was soon fastening up the dozen little snaps.

“Better?”  Zach asked as he picked Nathan up and held him.  He was already calm, but clearly tired.  Nathan nodded into Zach’s neck.  “Can you take a nap?  Then we can play with your new toys when you wake up?”

Nathan paused but then nodded again, too tired to put up even a mild protest.  Zach kissed his cheek and then laid him down in the Pack-and-Play, handing him Gustafer.

“Babbo hug?”

“Oh, Babbo’s taking a walk.”

“Bar?”

“You want to sleep with Gustafer and Bar?”

Nathan nodded, and his mom signaled him that she’d collect it from downstairs.

“His boots are kind of hard, and his hat doesn’t come off.  He’s not snuggly like Gustafer.”

Margo handed the bear into the crib and Nathan arranged his stuffed toys how he wanted them, an arm flung over both as if to prove Zach wrong.  “Bar and Guster.”

Zach bit back a smile, tempted to pull out his phone and take a picture, but not wanting to rile Nathan when he was so close to falling asleep.  “Okay, you’re right.  Have a good nap.  We’ll play when you wake up.”

Nathan closed his eyes and murmured, “Love daddy.”

Maybe it was the emotional roller-coaster of the last hour, but tears pricked Zach’s eyes.  “Love you too, Little Man.”

FW whatever day this is…

ato-the-bean:

There’s so little of this chapter that I can share without completely spoiling it, but here’s a short out-of-context snippet.  From Cleaving, but referencing Bleary.

Chris took a deep breath.  “To get that feeling for Steve, that terror and exhilaration and sense of being almost sure you’re right and this kiss is welcome, but oh if you’re wrong it’s so, so bad.  To get all that, I was thinking of the first time I kissed you.  

“You were… man, you were just not hearing what I was trying to tell you, and I remember this moment, I could almost hear a voice in my head whispering ‘jump!’  So I did.  I leaned in like I’d wanted to a hundred times before, but had always not, and when our lips touched my stomach actually flipped like I was falling.   I poured everything I had into that kiss — everything that I didn’t seem to have words for… or maybe the words I had didn’t reach you.  And there was this horrible moment that lasted an eon when I was sure I’d made a terrible, terrible mistake.  And then, suddenly it wasn’t a mistake at all.  I wasn’t falling.  I was flying. And it was perfect.”