Journey (Chris/Zach) NC-17

moitmiller:

“I have a different journey.” –Zachary Quinto

Zach’s eyes flicked briefly around the table then back to his script. He’d gotten it a few months ago, but this was the first time they were all sitting down to read it with Justin. The gang was back together without actually being back together, but it felt good enough. Anton’s absence was keenly felt, and Zach appreciated that his loss was acknowledged both in the letter he received with the script and in the script itself.

Amidst contract negotiations, none of the original—imperative—cast would have agreed to come back had they simply written Chekov out of the story. He deserved, and was given, an appropriate end to his arc, as short and bright as it had been.

The read-through took the better part of the afternoon. There were still changes to make—so many changes between now and post-production. God, it was going to take forever.

“That’s it for today, guys. Thanks for coming.”

Zoe laid a hand on Zach’s arm. “I’m so glad to have you back in town. I feel like I never got to see you in New York.”

“I know. Life is just … “ Zach lifted his hands in wordless expression. “Anyway, you’ll have to come over and see my new condo.”

“You’re living downtown, right? Just can’t give up that East coast lifestyle?”

“Can you blame me?”

“Hey Zach,” said a voice behind him.

Zach stiffened. They hadn’t seen one another since Chris got shitfaced the night he presented Zach with his Oscar Wilde Award. Pasting a smile on his face, Zach turned around.

Sofia was attached to Chris’s side. His arm rested across her shoulders and they were holding hands. Zach’s eyes flicked to their entwined fingers. Chris flushed pink across the bridge of his nose. He shook his hand free and side-stepped to leave enough room for the Holy Spirit between he and Sofia.

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I find your fic emotionally evocative. The characters navigate entirely by that, whether its good or bad, and they work through conflicts that way too. It’s satisfying to read when I feel disconnected in my own life.

That is… I’m stunned Suede.  That is the *best* thing you could have said.  It’s *exactly* how I try to come up with stories… who is in what headspace, and what would that make them do in some situation, and how would this other person respond based on their headspace, and where does that takes us?  It’s all about getting to different emotional states.  Any plot is just what I have to throw in their way to force them to deal with something.  I wasn’t sure anyone noticed. 

I think that makes me a “gardener” rather than an “architect” for the most part. 

Thanks so much!  As ever, you are incredibly astute.  And I’m pleased you find it satisfying.

mylittleredgirl:

pouahhh:

4 stages of trusting a person with your heart: spock’s version (jim)

aos spirk is like the soulmate au where they really, reALLY don’t want to be soulmates. they’re too young, they’re not ready, they haven’t had the right experiences to turn them into perfect halves of a whole, but here they fucking are and fate keeps throwing time travelers from other centuries at them to tie their fates together. 

and it’s inescapable, and it feels like an endless boxing match in close combat, where they don’t even LIKE each other, but for some fucking reason there’s a piece of each of their souls lodged in the other

but time and space passes while their fates are locked together, and they mellow to each other. they mature into grown men, seasoned officers, whose sharp edges that used to grate on each other have softened into something fond and familiar. they depended on each other from the beginning, but they grow to… like each other. they pause long enough in each other’s company to enjoy that strange synergy between them, that way when they relax enough it’s like they know each other’s thoughts (and oh there are times when Spock wants that so much it’s distracting, my thoughts to your thoughts)

and somewhere in the vastness of space, Jim learns that his home will always be the next star, and Spock learns that his home was never going to be a place, but a choice: a decision to follow one person wherever he leads. 

at his side. as if he’s always been there and always will. 

Saturday wording

suedescripture:

I have Sadkid!fic in the brain today. The one where I try to be “””edgy””” and write the past in present tense. Honestly, I don’t know where this is going, and this is basically het and mary-sue-ing and sparkly, slightly out-of-focus backstory, andandand I honestly don’t know how to put this brokenhearted beeb back together and neither does Zach and oh yeah the kid exists too. idk idk. I typed words for the last three hours, read them and tell me I did a good.

Tru didn’t drink,” Chris said, sliding his head sideways to grin wryly over at him, “Right? She tended bar, but she didn’t drink. Not even a beer.” The smile slid off his face as his eyes went dull at the porch boards. “Her dad was a drunk. Had her getting him cans of Bud out of the fridge when she was… barely Maia’s age. She didn’t have a lot of reasons to trust people. Men. Me.”

Zach nodded, “But she did, eventually?”

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“Cassini’s own discoveries were its demise.”

odditycollector:

– Earl Maize, its project engineer @ JPL

current mood: emotional about a space probe

Cassini is the first spacecraft that was destroyed not from malfunction, or as a necessary end result of its mission… but out of love.

The probe was running out of propulsion fuel, but there’s no reason it couldn’t have been pushed into a stable orbit from where it could collect data and send back pictures for a long while yet.

Except it had detected that one of Saturn’s moons held liquid water and organic compounds: a world that might support life. A world that is, at the least, dreaming of life.

There is no orbit stable enough to be certain that the probe, carrying
radioactive batteries

and Earth’s bacteria, would never have come into contact with Enceladus. A delicate island of alien life could have been snuffed out or overrun. The sheep could have eaten the rose.

So instead – for the love of this fragile possibility, this potential that might yet never be realized – Cassini was brought into a final, intimate tango with Saturn.

But of course, all space probes are built for the sake of awe, which is nearly love. Science is rational, but scientists are driven to understand the universe just as the religious strive to know the face of God.

The Cassini probe was a 4 billion dollar machine for understanding Saturn. And yesterday, two decades after it launched from our planet, it was destroyed while sending us information about Saturn it never could have gathered from a distant, stable orbit: advancing its purpose, even knowing that it would be consumed.

After learning my flight was detained 4 hours,
I heard the announcement:
If anyone in the vicinity of gate 4-A understands any Arabic,
Please come to the gate immediately.

Well—one pauses these days. Gate 4-A was my own gate. I went there.
An older woman in full traditional Palestinian dress,
Just like my grandma wore, was crumpled to the floor, wailing loudly.
Help, said the flight service person. Talk to her. What is her
Problem? we told her the flight was going to be four hours late and she
Did this.

I put my arm around her and spoke to her haltingly.
Shu dow-a, shu- biduck habibti, stani stani schway, min fadlick,
Sho bit se-wee?

The minute she heard any words she knew—however poorly used—
She stopped crying.

She thought our flight had been canceled entirely.
She needed to be in El Paso for some major medical treatment the
Following day. I said no, no, we’re fine, you’ll get there, just late,

Who is picking you up? Let’s call him and tell him.
We called her son and I spoke with him in English.
I told him I would stay with his mother till we got on the plane and
Would ride next to her—Southwest.

She talked to him. Then we called her other sons just for the fun of it.

Then we called my dad and he and she spoke for a while in Arabic and
Found out of course they had ten shared friends.

Then I thought just for the heck of it why not call some Palestinian
Poets I know and let them chat with her. This all took up about 2 hours.

She was laughing a lot by then. Telling about her life. Answering
Questions.

She had pulled a sack of homemade mamool cookies—little powdered
Sugar crumbly mounds stuffed with dates and nuts—out of her bag—
And was offering them to all the women at the gate.

To my amazement, not a single woman declined one. It was like a
Sacrament. The traveler from Argentina, the traveler from California,
The lovely woman from Laredo—we were all covered with the same
Powdered sugar. And smiling. There are no better cookies.

And then the airline broke out the free beverages from huge coolers—
Non-alcoholic—and the two little girls for our flight, one African
American, one Mexican American—ran around serving us all apple juice
And lemonade and they were covered with powdered sugar too.

And I noticed my new best friend—by now we were holding hands—
Had a potted plant poking out of her bag, some medicinal thing,

With green furry leaves. Such an old country traveling tradition. Always
Carry a plant. Always stay rooted to somewhere.

And I looked around that gate of late and weary ones and thought,
This is the world I want to live in. The shared world.

Not a single person in this gate—once the crying of confusion stopped
—has seemed apprehensive about any other person.

They took the cookies. I wanted to hug all those other women too.
This can still happen anywhere.

Not everything is lost.

Naomi Shihab Nye (b. 1952), “Wandering Around an Albuquerque Airport Terminal.” I think this poem may be making the rounds, this week, but that’s as it should be.  (via oliviacirce)

When I lose hope in the world, I remember this poem.

(via bookoisseur)

I’m really glad I read that.

(via selfesteampunk)